The past two years have been a profound period of reflection, growth, and self-forgiveness as I stepped back from the coaching industry—a space where I once heavily invested my time, energy and money. This journey has been about compassionately forgiving myself and learning from my experiences, ensuring I never unintentionally fall into the same patterns again.
With decades of entrepreneurial experience, along with undergraduate and postgraduate entrepreneurial qualifications, I entered the world of coaching as a seasoned small business strategist and advisor. I had already achieved business success, received awards for my businesses, and spoken at prominent events. It felt right to explore the online, location-independent business coaching world. The glamour of a luxury lifestyle was appealing, but more importantly, I saw an opportunity to travel, spend quality time with family, and share nearly three decades of hard-earned wisdom to make a significant impact.
Initially, the promises of success and what appeared to be genuine friendships (which I now know is the “love bombing” cult tactic) enticed me into the business coaching world. I sometimes ponder if my neurodivergence made me more susceptible to these tactics. It was indeed a hard pill to swallow, realising that even an intelligent person like me could overlook so many red flags.
For those fortunate enough not to tread this path, a brief insight: the life coaching and business coaching spheres (though not all, thankfully) often emphasise exorbitantly priced products and services. It's a cocktail of self-help 101, pyramid schemes, and MLM rhetoric, sprinkled with online marketing tactics most often by thin, attractive white women in hats.
It was an education in prioritising the words of a coach over my self-trust and encouragement to embrace and celebrate the obsession with money. But in hindsight, I see manipulative tactics that led to separating me from people with differing opinions and encouraging decisions that I now recognise as unethical.
Time and again, I found no unique value in these high-cost coaching programs that couldn't be gleaned from a few well-chosen books. They didn't have “the codes” or provide any new strategies, mindset tools or upleveling vibes. They were not qualified healers, councillors or therapists, but often marketed themself as being able to “work through your limiting beliefs and blocks that are holding you back”.
Though I kept my own coaching focus on providing business tools and support to help creative people launch and grow their businesses, I began to question the relentless push for charging high amounts alongside the obsession with appearing as "the guru" on social media and the insistence on spamming people daily with my posts.
My suggestion to anyone thinking about paying for a life or business coach is to first explore books on the subject you are after help with. I also believe in consulting with a qualified and registered therapist or counsellor, as personal wounds and trauma can sometimes interfere with growth. If further assistance is needed, seek an expert with proven qualifications and experience outside of the coaching world.
Through this reflective stroll, I've come to understand that wisdom doesn't merely come from success but also from the lessons we learn from our missteps. My time in the coaching industry was not a walk of shame, but a walk of wisdom—a path that has deepened my insight and compassion for myself and others.
As for my current path, alongside creating being an artist, I remain dedicated to supporting creative entrepreneurs. I believe the most significant impact I can make now is through pursuing a PhD to develop a framework influencing how local councils and governments support creative entrepreneurs—from education to resources to opportunities. Thus, my current focus is on a comprehensive literature review of academic writing on the subject.
If you want to better understand the red flags and unethical practices often used in the coaching industry, I recommend the book ‘Hey, hun’ (both about MLM and the coaching industry and how similar their tactics are, such a fun read too), or the podcasts A Little Bit Culty and Love & Light Confessionals.
